Coping With Loss & Grief, Tears don’t nullify your Sabr

We live in an age where alot of people are depressed. Depression manifests itself more commonly after the loss of a loved one, a child, a family member and people often fall into a cycle where they become consumed by their grief, and some people even get trapped in it.
We make dua that Allah SWT makes it easy for them.

Some individuals may go to grief counsellors or psychiatrists in order to try to attain some measure of peace, and more often than not the counsellor offers an outlet for your feelings.You speak and speak and speak and you sometimes feel better because you had someone listening to you. The counsellor may help you move from a place of broken-ness to whole-ness, but you may still not be able to overcome the grief. In these cases people need the encouragement of an islamic perspective to bind them back to the reality that is life. They need to be reminded of the one ness of allah. Often in times of great loss and grief, people become angry with Allah. They become upset with islam. They feel lost, turmoiled and some even turn their backs on islam as a result to their inability to cope with this tragedy that life is testing them with. Sometimes you just need a nudge or a reminder to turn to Allah.

Having recently discovered sister Yasmin Mogahed’s brilliant works all over the www, I am astounded, really.  Her videos, facebook updates, webinars, quotes, and blogposts never cease to amaze me at the depth and insight that is projected from her. The video feautured in this post is an excellent clip for all those who have experienced a loss on some level.  I urge you to watch it if you’re grieving, or if you haven’t yet made peace with your loss. Sister Yasmin presents ayah’s from the quraan and very easy to understand life scenarios to her audience to that they may have understanding in a ‘life’ context. These verses are Allah’s words, and what better reminder to turn to our faith. Alhumdulillah. Allah is indeed most merciful.

Maybe you feel that you have done everything to feel better and heal and move on, but you’re still stuck and nothing will change. You may have spent lots of money on trying to come to terms with your loss, or lots of time with counsellors and talking to friends and family.  If you are struggling with overcoming the emotional effects of a  loss,  I encourage you to watch this video and share it with any of your friends/family that may too be struggling. Maybe you have a friend that had a miscarriage, or her child passed away, or her spouse passed away, or a family member is now no more. This clip gives some introspection of loss from the islamic perspective, alhumudulillah.

Everything we have belongs to allah SWT, including our health and our beauty.
There are very strong messages in this video clip like :

“Crying does not necessarily negate sabr”.

Profound, in a right of it’s own. Subhanallah

I wish you peace, and that Allah swt easen your hurt and anguish. I hope this video helps you if you are in need.

Barakallahu Feek! May the blessings of Allah be upon you

Niqab for Beginners: Steps to wearing the Niqab

Guest post by Zaakirah Kadwa

See our first post:  The Decision to wear the niqab

It is preferable not to rush into wearing the niqab without  aknowledging the responsibility that wearing it entails. It is a means of placing a physical curtain  or screen between you and men, distancing yourself from unwanted attention as well as a manifestation of your spirituality. The benefits are numerous but most essentially you are adopting the niqab, to honour and uphold the islamic practise of segregation between the genders. By concealing your beauty you are protecting yourself from lustful gazes, molestation and being ‘hit on’, to name afew.

Step 1:

Before adopting the NIQAB , begin by embracing hijab in your life. Hijab is more than wearing a scarf, you should attempt to wear long length loose fitting tops which do not reveal your shape and covers your buttocks appropriately long pants accompanied with your beautiful scarf. This criterion should meet your dress style wherever you go be it the mall, library, school, campus. When you are comfortable with this step then move on to step two.

Step 2:

Adopt the HIJAAB completely and attempt to wear a cloak/abaya/other loose fit dress that does not reveal your shape. It is essential that you hair and arms be covered as a pre-requisite to wearing the niqab.

If you have decided to incorprate the abaya/kaftan/cloak into your dressing then Alhumdulillah, there are many beautiful, smart, elegent and stunning cloaks /abayas readily available. Purchase one or two and attempt to wear them whenever you leave the home or wear them for the duration that you are in  public places.  You will form the habit of wearing them and before you know
it this  act of donning the cloak will become a second skin to you. Sometimes it takes a year or more… if you’re lucky, less than a year, to develop a habit which, Insha-Allah, you will take forward with you into the future.

Implementation may differ from person to person, but once you are accustomed to it, it will be easy for you to cover your beauty for the pleasure of Allah SWT.  Remember, your cloaks need not to be drab, old fashioned or granny-like. Cloaks that are smart yet simple are easily available in South Africa. There are many variations that are wallet friendly if you are concerned with affordability. You can be trendy and smart while still in conforming to the laws of the shariah.


The purpose of hijaab should not be defeated. Your cloaks should not be tight enough so show off the contours of your body. Ensure that your hair does not peep through your scarf and no inch of your neck is visible.  Avoid transparent and net/lace scarves. Your arms should also be covered. When you are comfortable with this, you are now prepared for the final step – the NIQAAB!

NB: It is important that you are accustomed to the idea of “covering up” first before embracing the niqab permanently.

Stay tuned for our next post: Dealing with Niqab Prejudice

Niqab of the Day #34

Jumuah Mubarak : Let us Love

Let us love our sisters for the sake of Allah swt.

Jumuah Mubarak to our Muslimahs:)

We love you  <3

Picture source: Road to Jannah

Rumi Archive: Peaceful

Niqab for Beginners: I WANT to wear the Niqab / Purdah

Guest post by  Zaakirah Kadwa

Congratulations, my dear sister for intending to adopt the Niqab!
Alhumdulillah, it is solely due to the grace, Rahma and love that your creator has for you that he has chosen you to embark on this this noble and admirable journey…


A journey wherein you discover yourself from a new perspective.  This, my dear sister, is the beginning of a beautiful relationship with your Muslimah identity. Being brave enough to  move forward in the direction of donning the niqab indicates that you are earnest to  nurture this deep  respect for Allah’s rules of segregation between the genders. Yes, the niqab serves as a safety-net, a source of removing unwanted attention and many others; the physical barrier between the genders.

Many good deeds and points of khair are accompanied by tests and challenges.  Try to remain positive in the face of adversity. Be prepared to encounter challenges along the way- Rest assured, this journey is worth it all!

The decision of wearing the niqab is not merely covering the face with a piece of cloth. Infact, along with this piece of cloth comes a wave of responsibility. It is a means to represent your identity as a Muslim ;  You no longer represent yourself to the world, you represent the collective identity of the Muslim Woman. Alhumdulillah, it is a great honour and privilege. It is for you to uphold this beacon of hayaa that shines out to the world.

Free Webinar: Hardships & the Road to the Most Merciful by Yasmin Mogahed

This sounds like a brilliant webinar despite it being in the pre Fajr Hours for South Africa. If you can afford to sacrifice some sleep, register online for this live session on this  Link

Date: February 9th, 2012 -

Time : 8:30 PM EST – That is 03:30 AM (GMT +2:00) for South Africa

Link for Webcast will be Emailed to You 24 hours before commencement, so register online now

Speaker:  Yasmin Mogahed

Vist her website YasminMogahed.com

Bio : Yasmin Mogahed received her B.S. Degree in Psychology and her Masters in Journalism and Mass Communications from the University of Wisconsin-Madison. After completing her graduate work, she taught Islamic Studies and served as the Sisters’ Youth Director for the Islamic Society of Milwaukee. She also worked as a writing instructor for Cardinal Stritch University, and a staff columnist for the Islam section of InFocus News. Currently she’s an independent media consultant, a writer for the Huffington Post, and an author for Suhaibwebb.com, where she focuses most of her work on spiritual and personal development. Her written works, including a book chapter on the portrayal of Islam post-911, have appeared in print and online publications worldwide. Tune in to Serenity, her new show on One Legacy Radio, Wednesdays at 3:30 pm (PST), as she discusses questions on faith, spirituality and relationships from an Islamic spiritual lens.

Visit and Like her FaceBook Fanpage

Sometimes we all feel lost

Life damages us, tears us down, tries us in so many ways that just affirms our humanity and the human ability to feel.
We fall into despair, and sometimes we even lose our way.
For all those feeling distressed, lost or despondent, don’t give up in the mercy of Allah (swt).

Niqab of the Day #33

NIqab of the day #32

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